I am a planner. It's just what I do. I have try to be prepared for everything. I like having a plan and knowing what to expect when that plan starts to unfold.
This has advantages and disadvantages.
Since March 6th, the day we found out we were pregnant, I started planning for this baby. I instantly started researching everything there was to know about babies, baby gear, birth and 'how-to's' on raising him...etc.
I started shopping before we even knew the gender of this baby. So, needless to say, after we had our amazing baby shower we had everything we could think of to prepare for him to come. I have had baby shopping withdraws because there was literally not one other thing I could think of to buy for him, but I still wanted to. I told Austin last week it was going to be a looong 5 weeks because I was totally ready for him to come now at any time. (wrong).
On Saturday night we went on a date and I told him, "this could possibly be our last date before this baby comes, we better enjoy it!" And we did, but even at the movie I was having some 'braxton hicks' and feeling a bit nauseous. On Sunday, we went up the canyon and carved in our tree...the same tree we carved in September of 2010 and have carved every year since. This year we added, '13 + B (for baby, since we hadn't settled completely on a name yet). Sunday was also Dallas' birthday so we celebrated by having the siblings over and making snacks, watching football and relaxing. I got everyone's guess on when the baby would be born and his weight, and I said I couldn't make a guess until my 36 week appointment on Wednesday but for the last 2 weeks I have been telling everyone I just didn't feel like he was going to make it to his due date, although I would love for him to.
Sunday night Aust and I decided we should pack a hospital bag and just have it ready. It was coming down to that time. So we did. We pulled out all the things we needed for him at the hospital and set it out, and I was going to wash his clothes and blankets and pack them in his bag so we could just grab it and go when it was go time.
I never had a 'written' birth plan, but I definitely have imagined it over and over in my head of exactly how it should go...I'm a planner, so duh. Here's what I had in my head:
Austin would be in Vernal
I would go into labor slowly...slow enough for him to make it home in time to go to the hospital with me
I'd get an epidural, enjoy labor
push for maybe an hour
and voila...out comes our healthy baby boy
we snuggle and kiss him and everything would be so perfect we'd leave the hospital 2 days later and settle into parenthood.
Wrong. All wrong.
On Sunday night we were laying in bed, feeling our son move around and just talked about him non stop. I asked Aust if it had hit him yet that he was going to be a dad... and in just a few weeks?! I said even having him with me for 9 months I didn't feel like it was quite reality yet.
So here's how it all went down:
Monday morning around 4 am I woke Austin up and said, "I don't want to freak you out but I don't think this is pee." But I was certain it wasn't my water breaking because it hadn't gushed out or anything like that. So I changed, got back in bed and had a few braxton hicks contractions and finally drifted back to sleep around 6. At 6:59 I shot out of bed and grabbed the nearest towel to stand on and said, "yep, it's happening again." So Austin is looking at me asking if my water was breaking and I kept saying there's no way but I don't know what else it could be really?! I decided to jump in the shower, then we could go to the hospital just to check. We called our moms and they both thought it would be gushing if it were my water breaking, but go just in case. So we did.
We got to the hospital around 8, got checked in and the nurse tested the fluid and verified it was in fact amniotic fluid, I was dilated to a 3 and 80% thinned.
Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. He was 4 weeks early and there wasn't anything I could do to hold off any longer. Had it only been contractions, they could stop them and put me on bed rest but once my water was broke I had 24 hours to get him out.
As my luck would go, my doctor was out of town so the on call doctor, Dr Lind, would deliver me. He came to check on me at about 9 and said I was only dilated to a 2 and 70% and to prepare for a long day.
I didn't believe him. I thought for sure I'd deliver by 7 or 8 pm.
The nurse started me on pitocin and I got a couple little cat naps in and about 2 I asked for my epidural.
This is where the day took a turn for the worst.
The epidural had punctured my spinal cavity and during the 'test dose' I was completely paralyzed from the the belly down...
then I started having a contraction that wouldn't stop. It kept going and going and the nurse started to get worried. The baby's heart rate dropped so they decided they needed to put a probe in his head. They laid be back to do this and the epidural started rising up my body. I was getting worried when my arms went numb, then I thought I was going to choke on my gum...then I couldn't talk...then I felt like I couldn't breathe.
The 5 nurses were focused on the baby and I was trying to say I couldn't breathe and Austin saw me struggling and told them. They immediately sat me up and I was panicking because I couldn't swallow at this point and felt like I needed to throw up.
I started to calm down after my baby's heart rate settled and the epidural very slowly started to come back down my body.
Out of the 5 nurses only one had seen this happen once with the epidural. It's a 1-5% chance and of course it would happen to me.
The pitocin and epidural were stopped and we waited 4 hours for it to wear off. They weren't sure how to dose me at that point. I had no progress during that time so I was stuck at a 6 for 5 hours.
I got a new anesthesiologist at that point and he was amazing. He explained everything to me and exactly how he was going to dose me the rest of the night. He had to hand dose me every time I felt any pain, so it would wear off...I'd get dosed...and the right side would be completely dead but the left side would just take the edge off.
Finally around 11pm the Dr said I'd be ready to push in an hour.
I started pushing at 12:01 and was having strong contractions every 2-3 seconds.
Did I mention I was puking my entire delivery? Ya..just to top it all off.
I wasn't making very fast progress.
at 2:50am the Dr came in and said he was posterior (face up). So he tried turning him with his hand.
At this point my epidural had completely worn off. I was breathing through my contractions until this point and I lost all focus. My baby's heart beat dropped and I was done. I couldn't take it anymore. The Dr thought it would be best to take him C-section and I agreed.
I was begging for something to take the pain and finally got some as they wheeled me in to the O.R.
I couldn't believe after 3 hours of pushing it came down to this.
The anesthesiologist was there talking me through exactly what was going to happen. I could feel my body getting paralyzed up to my neck again. I couldn't feel anything but my belly. What the hell was going on. I could feel them doing the 'pinch test' and they decided to numb me with shots and just started cutting. I could feel everything. Not the pain but everything. I can't even explain it. I couldn't get myself to calm down. I was so grateful I had Austin by my side. He kept saying, "just look at me babe, you can do this...he's almost here. It's almost over".
Then I finally heard his cry at 3:34 am. The most amazing sound I've ever heard. At that moment, I couldn't feel any pain, I've never felt so alive and so focused.
Austin went to take pictures of him and I couldn't wait to see my baby for the first time.
They laid him by my head and staring at this poor little bruised face I couldn't help but kiss him and cry. I couldn't believe he was mine.
He weighed 6 lbs. 7 oz. and 18 inches long. He came out with a head full of black hair and just as perfect as can be.
Zeeland L. Christensen was everything I ever dreamed of and more. I had waited so long to see that tiny face and the time had finally come.
Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. He was 4 weeks early and there wasn't anything I could do to hold off any longer. Had it only been contractions, they could stop them and put me on bed rest but once my water was broke I had 24 hours to get him out.
As my luck would go, my doctor was out of town so the on call doctor, Dr Lind, would deliver me. He came to check on me at about 9 and said I was only dilated to a 2 and 70% and to prepare for a long day.
I didn't believe him. I thought for sure I'd deliver by 7 or 8 pm.
The nurse started me on pitocin and I got a couple little cat naps in and about 2 I asked for my epidural.
This is where the day took a turn for the worst.
The epidural had punctured my spinal cavity and during the 'test dose' I was completely paralyzed from the the belly down...
then I started having a contraction that wouldn't stop. It kept going and going and the nurse started to get worried. The baby's heart rate dropped so they decided they needed to put a probe in his head. They laid be back to do this and the epidural started rising up my body. I was getting worried when my arms went numb, then I thought I was going to choke on my gum...then I couldn't talk...then I felt like I couldn't breathe.
The 5 nurses were focused on the baby and I was trying to say I couldn't breathe and Austin saw me struggling and told them. They immediately sat me up and I was panicking because I couldn't swallow at this point and felt like I needed to throw up.
I started to calm down after my baby's heart rate settled and the epidural very slowly started to come back down my body.
Out of the 5 nurses only one had seen this happen once with the epidural. It's a 1-5% chance and of course it would happen to me.
The pitocin and epidural were stopped and we waited 4 hours for it to wear off. They weren't sure how to dose me at that point. I had no progress during that time so I was stuck at a 6 for 5 hours.
I got a new anesthesiologist at that point and he was amazing. He explained everything to me and exactly how he was going to dose me the rest of the night. He had to hand dose me every time I felt any pain, so it would wear off...I'd get dosed...and the right side would be completely dead but the left side would just take the edge off.
Finally around 11pm the Dr said I'd be ready to push in an hour.
I started pushing at 12:01 and was having strong contractions every 2-3 seconds.
Did I mention I was puking my entire delivery? Ya..just to top it all off.
I wasn't making very fast progress.
at 2:50am the Dr came in and said he was posterior (face up). So he tried turning him with his hand.
At this point my epidural had completely worn off. I was breathing through my contractions until this point and I lost all focus. My baby's heart beat dropped and I was done. I couldn't take it anymore. The Dr thought it would be best to take him C-section and I agreed.
I was begging for something to take the pain and finally got some as they wheeled me in to the O.R.
I couldn't believe after 3 hours of pushing it came down to this.
The anesthesiologist was there talking me through exactly what was going to happen. I could feel my body getting paralyzed up to my neck again. I couldn't feel anything but my belly. What the hell was going on. I could feel them doing the 'pinch test' and they decided to numb me with shots and just started cutting. I could feel everything. Not the pain but everything. I can't even explain it. I couldn't get myself to calm down. I was so grateful I had Austin by my side. He kept saying, "just look at me babe, you can do this...he's almost here. It's almost over".
Then I finally heard his cry at 3:34 am. The most amazing sound I've ever heard. At that moment, I couldn't feel any pain, I've never felt so alive and so focused.
Austin went to take pictures of him and I couldn't wait to see my baby for the first time.
They laid him by my head and staring at this poor little bruised face I couldn't help but kiss him and cry. I couldn't believe he was mine.
He weighed 6 lbs. 7 oz. and 18 inches long. He came out with a head full of black hair and just as perfect as can be.
Zeeland L. Christensen was everything I ever dreamed of and more. I had waited so long to see that tiny face and the time had finally come.
 |
| [the last belly picture] |
 |
| [so thankful for this man to be by my side. He never panicked. He stayed calm and talked me through all my hard moments. I love him] |
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| [FINALLY ready to push...yuck] |
 |
 |
| [look at that poor bruised face...break my heart] |
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| [my family] |
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